The Legend So Far...
Some say she was born with glittering pasties adhered to her nipples. Others say her placenta was actually a fully-fashioned seamed stocking (black of course). Much of Trixi Tassels' early life is a mystery, but what is known is that her mother died during childbirth and her father eloped with the midget dancer of a travelling circus troupe.
Sent to live in an orphanage, Trixi would mesmerise the wet nurses with her twirling tassels, enabling her to suckle extra milk to grow big and strong. When the other orphans became jealous and started harassing Trixi, she attached small, shiny blades to her tassels which soon kept the girls far away.
At the age of eleven Trixi discovered a fascination with fire after an unfortunate incident with the head matron's blouse and a gas stove. Stealthily ferreting away small quantities of fuel, Trixi was able to indulge her new found interest and her love of watching the soft orange glow of fire glide across her skin. Her stay in the orphanage wasn't to last much longer.
One of the other girls, scarred from an early encounter with the blade tassels, discovered Trixi's covert stash of fuel and informed the head matron. An enraged Trixi set fire to the curtains in her room, forcing the mass evacuation of all residents and the complete devastation of the building. Slinking away quietly into the night in all the confusion with just the clothes on her back and her trusty fuel, Trixi set forth for the new world.
Her journey was long and harrowed. Little did she know but the orphanage had been in a very isolated part of the country; wind-swept, sun-scorched and offering little in the way of nourishment. Small animals and cacti formed her only means of survival.
After many weeks making her way across the desolate landscape she came across a group of nomadic gypsies who had taken to performing skillful striptease and novelty acts to earn money. Trixi aroused their curiosity and they cautiously welcomed her into their fold. It turned out to be a lucrative decision. Following their training and with a new obsession with anything shiny, Trixi was able to earn the gypsies more money than they had ever seen in their lives and more sparkly things than they had room to accommodate.
Frustrated by the requirement to split evenly all the earnings with the group who had become more and more lazy, Trixi hatched plans to leave the nomads. Slipping out quietly one night with her bags of acquired costuming, Trixi was nearly home free when one of the gypsies heard a noise and came out with a torch to investigate. Discovering her plot, the gypsy thrust the burning torch towards Trixi's tassels, setting them alight. With her hands full and a furious gypsy at her heels, Trixi was forced to escape with her tassels blazing and only her twirling skills to keep them from scorching her tender flesh.
When they eventually extinguished Trixi had escaped into the night and acquired a new-found skill that would prove her main money-spinner as she made her way through the burlesque badlands, twirling and peeling her way to The Big City.
The rest, as they say, is history.
Some true words...
Podcast the First: Fire, Fusion and Essential Life Skills with Trixi Tassels!
In this inaugural episode of the podcast, Rosie and Trixi chat about learning bellydance in New Zealand; going over to the dark side; belly vs. burly; tassel twirling and giant tits; professional polish; what makes a good performer; essential tips for making good fusion; burlesque boot camp; and the essential question: Why do artists Art?
For bookings please send an email to firstname.lastname@example.org